The Air We Breathe
by TragischerRomantiker
Summary: It's hard to not smile when in the presence of one's idol, as in the case between this Rin and the Lady Izayoi. "I do as Lord Sesshomaru says. My life belongs to him and... so does my heart."


_If you have not read chapter 558 of Rumiko Takahashi's fantastic manga series, InuYasha, or watched the rest of the awesome anime in InuYasha: The Final Act, then I suggest you go and do that before you read this fanfic as there will be plenty of spoilers (and shame on you for not finishing the series! XD). Aside from that... enjoy!_

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Rin knelt alone in the meadow. She'd always been somewhat of an outcast from the rest of the village girls. It was a great dishonor for a girl to be so boyish, but Rin didn't care. There were a lot of things about herself that the village women didn't approve of, one of those many things was her being raised by a demon during the younger years of her life. That was just unheard of. Yet in spite of all the fault the women found in Rin, they could only say that the things that made Rin so borish... were the very same things that made her so beautiful.

Rin had grown to be an enchanting and lovely woman. Every man in the village wanted her for himself, as well as many men from other villages. Tales of her wonderful aura had spread far and wide. Her beauty radiated throughout her body; from the inside out. Even her smile was magical, as though each time she did so in another's presence, a piece of her heart and soul was shared with that person. Rin had an awe inspiring glow about her that no one was powerful enough to douse. But all who knew her well enough knew she reserved a special place in her heart where no man would ever be able to reside, for that place was reserved for a certain demon.

She sighed to herself, grazing her nimble fingers over the soft petals of a tiger lily. She smiled lightly at the flower; it was quite beautiful. Over the many years, Rin had made a habit of picking fresh flowers every Thursday. Some she would share with the villagers, but there was a main reason she gathered these flowers. Rin added the tiger lily to the wide variety of flowers in her basket, hand-woven by none other than herself. She stood from her spot in the meadow and began heading for her destination.

As she began making her way up the long slope of the hill, tripping on twigs with her bare feet and stubbing her dainty toes on rocks, she wondered idly if anyone knew where she went when she left the village. Rin chuckled slightly. She guessed that someone had probably figured it out but had not said anything... out of politeness, she was sure. This ritual of hers wasn't anything new, as it had been on going since sometime around the time she was left by her Lord over a decade ago, seeing as she was on the brink of her twentieth year. Which reminded her of that place in her heart. That place where a flicker of a flame still burned for him, like a candle fighting against a breeze.

The trees finally opened to the top of the hillside where Rin found what she was looking for. Lady Izayoi's grave. She smiled at the site and bowed out of respect for the deceased woman. The long blades of grassed tickled Rin's dirt-covered feet, and the wind picked up as Rin knelt before the grave, her back to the astounding view consisting of mountains, waterfalls, as well as a happy and thriving valley. For a moment, Rin stared at her hands, which were smudged in a light layer of mud. She could almost hear the village women scolding her for rolling in the filth that is nature, but Rin wasn't bothered by her grass-stained kimono, or her mess of tangled, wild hair. She closed her eyes, putting their shrill voices aside somewhere in the back of her mind, and allowing the tranquil sounds of her natural environment to clear her thoughts. Rin sighed in relief and grinned at the headstone beneath the tree. It's a difficult feat to not smile when in the presence of your idol, as in the case between this Rin and the Lady Izayoi.

"Lady Izayoi, I've brought fresh flowers for you!" Rin reached into her basket and pulled out a large bouquet, setting it upon Izayoi's grave, "You and I... we're so much the same."

Rin paused and sighed, rolling onto her back to gaze up at the clouds from the shade of the tree. She moved her hands behind her head, hair splayed out in all directions. "Sometimes I wonder, Lady Izayoi, if our stories will end the same, too. But somehow... I just find it too simple, and I've learned that nothing in this world can be simple. I've always held a deep admiration for Lord Sesshomaru, but... I can't help but wonder when my admiration suddenly transformed into a yearning." She strained her neck to gaze at the headstone, "I can not help but think that you must've been through a similar situation with... er... I suppose he would have been called _Master_ Inutaisho?"

She blinked and then chuckled a tad, not really knowing what title Sesshomaru's father had gone by, and not knowing if he would still go by said title even though he was no longer living. She supposed it didn't really matter. The thought was there and that's what counted. Rin smiled and got to her feet, brushing off any loose dirt and bugs clinging to her intricate and colorful kimono that was hiked up at the knees. Sesshomaru always brought her the most dazzling kimonos. Rin grabbed hold of her basket and stood in front of Izayoi's resting place with a smile graced over her gentle features.

"I live because Lord Sesshomaru has willed it so. My life belongs to him, and so I do as Lord Sesshomaru says." Though her smile remained, a certain sadness clouded her usually bright eyes, "If he comes to retrieve me as nothing more than a vassal to him, then I can live out the remainder of my life peacefully without strife and feelings of missing something within my heart... but I know I'm just lying to myself. Sometimes I feel as though he's forgotten about me, like I wait for his return in vain. Afterall... I _am_ just... a _silly_..._ human_ girl... falling for an Inudaiyoukai who will never be romantically inclined toward the likes of someone like me."

The human wiped the tears from her eyes and a fierce, determined expression replaced her previous one, "But I have to try _something_! If I give up hope of his return... I give up on _life_! And I won't let that happen! Because Lord Sesshomaru has reason to keep me alive! I might not know what that reason is, but I trust Lord Sesshomaru's decisions! I do as Lord Sesshomaru says; I live how Lord Sesshomaru wishes. My life belongs to him... and... so does my heart."

Rin smiled warmly at the colorful flowers she left beneath the small tombstone marking Lady Izayoi's grave. She, again, bowed with her hands pressed together out of respect for InuYasha's deceased mother. As she turned to leave she spared one last glance at the grave on the hill top, "Lady Izayoi... thank you for listening to me."

With that, Rin pushed the tree branches aside and began her descent down the hillside to return to the village.

••**•**••

She had returned to the village several hours ago. Her basket of flowers was a huge success among the villagers. She made her usual stops and deliveries to merchants, inn keepers, elderly, sick folk, she even gave out a few flowers to the village children. Now she sat at the edge of the water reserve, watching the ripples the fish made from below the surface. She smiled, skimming the water with her fingertips and watching her reflection warp into strange shapes.

Thoughts swam through her head like the minnows she observed below the water. After her parents died Rin was given a place to stay in a small village. It wasn't "home" but it was a place to call her own, for, afterall, she _was_ on her own. Despite the fact that she had resided in said village, Rin was still alone in the world. Those were the days she never spoke... never smiled, and the villagers pitied her. Then everything changed when she was revived by her Lord Sesshomaru. It was just her, Master Jaken, and Lord Sesshomaru. Ah-Un, the two-headed dragon, joined them so Rin, the slow human child, could keep up with her fast-paced demon companions. Even after that, Sango's younger brother, Kohaku, was with them for awhile. And that was it. That was her life, and that was her family. However, her happiness was short-lived. Rin was left in the priestess Kaede's care as a seven year old child after the defeat of Naraku. She was _told_ to stay in the village.

By far, this village was more kind and accepting of Rin's situation than her previous one... but to stay in a village would mean to be tamed... and Rin was not so willing to give up her freedom. Had Lord Sesshomaru not ordered her to stay here... Rin probably would have left a long time ago in search of her demon Lord. For although the many village people were kind, and she was welcomed with open arms like a long-lost relative... Rin felt more isolated _here_ in the last decade than she had felt during her _entire_ childhood.

When Sesshomaru left her behind to fight Magatsuhi, Rin had thought it was just like any other time he had left her... she would be a _nuisence_; she would only get in the way. Rin had always respected this trait in her Lord. He wanted to fight without being hindered with the protection of a little girl.

"But I'm _not_ a useless little girl anymore..." Rin muttered to herself, frustrated with her current situation.

She caressed the petals of a nearby daisy with her right hand and hugged her knees to her chest with her left. She watched as a frog on a lily pad lashed its tongue out at a dragonfly, snatching its prey with wicked-sharp reflexes and masterful precision. Why did she smile so often when her heart was telling her there were only reasons to frown? Even the thought of that answer brought a smile to her face; because Sesshomaru _likes_ to see her smile. He had never said this, of course, but somehow... Rin could sense it... she could feel it like an emotion.

With all the joy she shared and brought to people, it would seem, she guessed, to anyone looking at her, that she was one of the most cheerful people on the planet. That wasn't true, though. She was no more or less happy than any one else. That's something that made her human... human and unworthy to be graced with the presence of Lord Sesshomaru. Rin sighed heavily. She supposed, to Lord Sesshomaru, she would always be nothing more than that same little girl he saved thirteen years ago. She gave herself a single firm nod with a sad smile. If that was all he would see her as, then she would just have to live with that... but if only he would take her back... she would try to change his mind...

"Riri-saaaamama!" her thoughts were interrupted by the voice of a small child.

A girl's voice called after the first one, "Wait! 'Shiro-chan! Come back here!"

She raised her head and turned to see a couple kids running downhill toward her. She let her knees slide beside her and she pushed her pesimistic thoughts to the back of her mind for the timebeing. "Toushiro, Itsuka! To what do I owe this pleasent surprise?" Rin asked the children with a light smile.

Itsuka was one of Miroku and Sango's twin daughters, and Toushiro happened to be InuYasha and Kagome's only child. He flung his arms around Rin's neck with excitement, shouting her name over and over again. Rin chuckled at his enthusiasm. "Sorry, Miss. Rin," Itsuka appologized with a shrug, "I'm supposed to be baby-sitting, buuut..."

"That's all right, Itsuka." Rin assured the eleven year old.

Rin directed her attention to the small boy in her arms. "Where are your parents, Toushiro? Would your time not better be spent in their arms than in mine?"

"Oh! Well Kagome and Inu-" Itsuka was silenced by the Lady Rin's soothing voice, "Forgive me, but I believe that question was directed at Toushiro."

The boy pouted slightly before answering Rin. "Dou un Mama... go out ob nebvilagg." Rin never seemed to have any issues understanding the three-year-old, but she knew he was embarassed with his own speech because so many could not hear his words.

"I see. So they went out of the village." Rin confirmed, watching the small boy's chocolate orbs become only half-lidded.

He was twirling one of his shaggy onyx locks in his small chubby fingers. Itsuka knelt beside the village's sparkling maiden. Few had a deep connection with Rin at all; most saw her as the heart and soul of the village, but to those people she was nothing more than that. Itsuka knew that Toushiro saw Rin as much more than just a bright light, or a village trophy... to him, she was like a second mother. Even Itsuka felt that bond between herself and Rin.

Rin had been humming softly and stroking the small boy's hair with gentle touches until she felt a length of her hair lifted from its place of rest. She found that Itsuka was playing with her hair. The girl handled the silky raven strands of hair with steady hands. Rin's melodic voice continued to hum a cheerful little tune while Itsuka tied braids and flowers into Rin's beautiful hair and the human child slept in her arms. What a shame such a peaceful life would never bring her true happiness.

••**•**••

"Sesshomaru!" InuYasha called into the middle of the forest.

He was answered by the annoying nasally voice that usually followed his brother everywhere in the form of a little green toad demon, "That's _Lord_ Sesshomaru to _you_, you filthy Half-breed!"

"Jaken..."

"Er... yes, Lord Sesshomaru?" The voice asked with a note of fear.

"Shutup."

InuYasha had followed the two voices beyond the trees to a clearing on the hilltop that overlooked a little valley. He was carrying Kagome on his back and halted in his tracks by the scene before him; Sesshomaru was standing before his mother's grave. What motivation could Sesshomaru possibly have for visiting this place... except to thoroughly enrage InuYasha. The hanyou's brows furrowed as anger flashed across his topaz eyes. "Hey! Sesshomaru! What th' hell d'you-"

"So this is the grave of your _weak_ mother, is it, InuYasha?" The stoic demon asked, back turned.

"What of it?" InuYasha questioned defensively.

"... Nothing." Sesshomaru spared a glance at his half-brother before disappearing into the trees with the little toad following close behind.

InuYasha's glare remained on his face. "Damn Bastard... Fucker doesn't even like-"

"InuYasha!" Kagome called from his back.

Startled by her sudden outburst, InuYasha was quick to set her down gently. "What? What is it, Kagome? Are you okay? Did the baby kick?"

She laughed. He was worse than Miroku when it came to being an expectant father. She wasn't even through her first trimester yet and he was all ready asking if she could feel the baby kicking. What a worry wart. "No... look over there." She said, motioning to the headstone beneath the tree.

InuYasha was, for once in his life, at a loss for words. Upon his mother's grave was the most glorious bouquet of flowers he had ever seen. Had Sesshomaru placed them there? No. That wasn't possible. He hated humans... well... save for Rin, who was the single exception to this rule. InuYasha knelt in front of Lady Izayoi's grave and touched the soft petals of the bright orange tiger lily. There was a familiar scent upon the flowers that didn't belong to Sesshomaru. His nose sniffed at the air and Kagome asked him what he was smelling with his sensitive nose.

The scent belonged to the one and only reason Sesshomaru ever came around this area. "Rin."

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_Lemme know what you thought, I love reviews!_

_InuYasha as well as the characters are all copyrighted by Rumiko Takahashi. Thanks for the great manga/anime Rumiko-sensei!_

_Er... I guess I'll take responsibility for Toushiro and the plot line of this particular fanfic, but I make no profit from this at all. I simply do this because I enjoy writing fanfics. Other than that and a sense of self-accomplishment, REALLY, I gain nothing._


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